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10 Suggested Ways T-Mobile Can Further Punish Pro-Union Employees

Photo courtesy Joachim S. Muller on Flickr

On Tuesday, the National Labor Relations Board  consolidated several complaints  against T-Mobile for alleged anti-union practices, which will lead to a nationwide ruling several months down the road. Among the accusations of illegal behavior made by the Communications Workers of America ( CWA ) against the company are employee intimidation and interrogation and strong opposition to union organizing activities. 

If that wasn't bad enough, a T-Mobile manager in Albuquerque, N.M., allegedly withheld the "high five" hand gesture from pro-union employees. In light of that revelation and in the spirit of poking fun at T-Mobile, here are 10 suggestions as to how T-Mobile managers could further punish pro-union employees:

1. Have anti-union and pro-union employees wear different-colored work shirts, so that they are clearly identifiable for managers.

2. Pro-union employees only get one napkin from the company cafeteria (anti-union employees get UNLIMITED napkins).

3. Raise prices on all non-chocolate items in the company vending machine by a quarter for pro-union employees.

4. Pro-union employees not allowed to participate in casual Fridays.

5. Only anti-union employees are eligible for gold stars for doing a good job.

6. The pro-union workers only get one-ply toilet paper (anti-union employees get two-ply).

7. Free copy of "T-Mobile for Dummies" provided to all anti-union employees; pro-union employees don't get a copy.

8. Pro-union employees not allowed to play the custom T-Mobile foosball table in the break room.

9. On "Bring Your Pet to Work Day," pro-union employees only allowed to bring goldfish to work.

10. When performing team-building trust falls, let pro-union employees fall without catching them.

We kid, we kid. But seriously, withholding a high-five? Now that's just cold. 

Hat tip to Jacob Fischler at BuzzFeed

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